New day, new week, same old mommy

I am ready for the new week. It is the first Monday in...who knows how long?...that I've actually said that, let alone really felt it. But tomorrow Lil E starts a new daycare, a loving place run by a warm and talkative woman where four other boys his age play, and I think that will be a good change. I have two fun work assignments to bite into and I'm excited to spend some time catching up on all the blogs I've had to set aside for a bit while I take care of myself. I am ready.

***

A few tiny weekend moments stopped me in my tracks. Early on Saturday morning (well, early to me, which is 7:20 a.m. but is practically lunch for many parents...I know, I know), Bruce was at work and Lil E was awake, so I pulled him up into my arms and nestled him into bed with me. I was hoping for a few extra minutes of sleep before a big day of a bridal shower and family get-together and actually blow drying my hair for those events and all that weekend business. I faced him and he curled himself into my arms. I closed my eyes for a few quiet moments but I could tell his eyes were open and watching me closely. I thought maybe, just maybe, if I breathed in a slow, steady rhythm, it would lull him into relaxation. Instead, I felt his little fingers and freshly cut nails tracing my lips, then pulling gently at my lips, then outlining my eyebrows and making circles on my cheeks.

I squeezed his little body just slightly and, with my eyes still closed, said, "Honey, please don't do that. Please don't play with my face. Shhhhh..."

He was quiet and he pulled his hand away and then began again with the lips and the eyebrows and my cheeks and now my nose.

I opened my eyes and looked at him. He was only inches away.

"Lil E, sweetie, please don't play with my face."

He batted those long eyelashes over brown, brown eyes, then squinted slightly in a pause of great worked-up sincerity and said, "But mommy, I'm doing it because I love you. I just love you so much."

I smiled and squeezed. I know well where he heard those words as a justification for something he probably has found just as pesky -- tickles or kisses all over the face or being swept up in a hug in the middle of playing monster trucks. So I got it. And I got it back. And no matter how much of a negotiator or drama queen that boy is, I got it.

So we climbed out of bed, poured orange juice and made our way to the couch. There, we stretched out next to each other watching the Today show. Lil E's heart, racing from jumping off the bed and running into the living room, quieted as he settled into the throw pillows. I pulled him in just a teense closer, partly so we'd both fit on the couch and partly just to smell his hair. And then, well, of course, I closed my eyes. But only for a few minutes.