A date. With a man. Part 2

 A few days after Lil E asked me about dating, became a robot, and then powered down when I told him that I had been out with someone, the whole dating situation took a turn.

We were out for a Mommy and Lil E Movie night and somehow survived the money-sucking soul-vacuum that is Ice Age 3 (the only saving grace being that Denis Leary is somehow sexier when his voice comes out of a cartoon Smilodon). Our 3-D glasses were propped up on our heads and the reusable bottles of water we snuck in were stashed in my purse (actively raising a rebel over here). We walked to the car, holding hands and happy, sharing our favorite (ahem) parts of the movie.

I buckled him into his car seat, leaned in to kiss him before I shut the door, like I always do. But this time, I paused and leaned back to look at him. It was dark out and the light inside the car shone down on him and made his eyes glimmer.

"I'm not sure if you realized," I said seriously, my face only a few inches from his, "but I was on a date with a man tonight."

He stared back, raised an eyebrow, tightened his lips. I smiled slowly.

"A date with a LITTLE man!" I continued, pressing my nose into his for an Eskimo kiss.

He laughed. Loudly.

"Yeah, Mommy!" He got it. He giggled. He pointed to himself. "A date with THIS LITTLE MAN!"

When the words came out my mouth, I wasn't sure how they would be received. But I hoped that they would diffuse some of the tension and emotion around a subject that is really too big for a little boy to take on.

The next day, the words were spoken again. Or rather, yelled out from the car as Lil E leaped out of his seat to see my parents.

"Mommy went to the movies on a date with a man!" He was smiling and screaming at the same time.

I am pretty sure my mother gasped in the pause that must have only really lasted a second or two.

"A date with a LITTLE MAN!" He giggled again. He pointed to himself again.

My parents relaxed, laughed with him, pulled him from the car and hugged him tight.

We're all nervous about this part of the transition, particularly the wonderful and protective people who haven't been dating men who are taller than 3 feet and aren't covered in a fine layer of goldfish cracker dust (OK, mostly).

The serious talks will eventually resume once the robot is ready. For now, though, I'm perfectly happy laughing about a bad movie with a small boy who understands he occupies most of my heart.  I love that this kid feels safer knowing that most nights time with a little man trumps anyone else.

Comments

[Nancy]

That brought tears to my eyes!

[Angie]

This is a comment to this as well as to 'Date with a Man." You are an amazing mother! When you make that conscious choice to always be honest with your child, the uncomfortable decisions that will face you at every developmental stage and event in life are more difficult to tackle, as you have chosen to not cover up with little white lies. You handled this sensitive subject with a developmental appropriateness that is clearly instinctive for you. Lil E is so fortunate to have you as his mommy!

[DIanne]

Very Sweet! You and Lil E are really in sync.